No Escaping Destiny

I really don't know what I would do with myself if I didn't have my writing.  It's like there was no escaping it.  The creature had to be made.

I had this weird reflective moment a couple days ago.  I started thinking about my younger, elementary-aged self and then compared it to what I am doing right now as an adult.  I have to say, I would never have called it.  Just about the last thing I wanted to do was teach the violin.

I should have known better than to jinx myself.  Now in retrospect I can't think of anything else I would rather be doing that teaching music.  The pieces just all seemed to fit together.

The thing is with private teaching is that most of your work happens in the after school/work hours.  Aside from a handful of homeschoolers and adult students, I mostly have the morning and early afternoon free.  Which is nice.  It's when I make the time to exercise or run errands.

It's also when I write.  I've always had an interest in writing but as soon as I learned about e-publishing the whole thing became "real" to me (for lack of a better way to phrase that).  It became a challenge.  I don't care how many copies I sell but just the sheer act of publishing pushes me to improve my craft.  Sort of like doing a concert in front of the public.

Teaching challenges me as well but it's different.  It's more draining.  You're constantly having to motivate others to do better.  It's a lot of your energy going out.  Writing balances that out for me.  Outside factors give inspiration and motivation.  So it's outside energy going in.

This weird reflective moment continued and I realized that I don't know what I would do with myself if I didn't have my writing.  For me the writing and the teaching are a perfect balance.  Yin and Yang.  If I only taught students all the time I would probably burn myself out and do god knows only what in the afternoon (obsess over emails?).

It was only by chance that I happened to see an advertisement for e-publishing.  And I just so happened to stumble across it in the early stages of my teaching career which allowed the two jobs have grown up and intertwined with each other.

I don't make as much writing as I do teaching but that doesn't matter.  Emotionally, it's necessary.


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